When Maxx came to our family, I had to put away heels for a while.
Maxx is a very exuberant child. He quickly discovered that it was loads of fun to get a 20' head start and run at me full speed from down the hall at Church, smacking into me at just below pelvis height. He and my chiropractor loved this. I did not.
I was not prepared for this behavior. My Molly was born in my mid twenties - a tiny, little feather of a thing that couldn't (and wouldn't) knock a kitten over. Maxx is all boy and made of lead - especially his head, which was also to his advantage when head-butting me during hold downs, but that's a totally different set of injury stories.
I quickly learned how to recognize the distinct sound of his little feet running toward me and I developed a pretty good horse stance but the heels had to go. (Along with skinny skirts - it is impossible do a hold down in a skinny skirt without pulling said skinny skirt up waaaaay beyond the bounds of decency.) Flats were the only footwear that would allow me to survive sudden impact with any sort of grace and a minimum of spinal damage.
Now that Maxx (aka Thrash Maxxwell, the Amazing Lead Head) is almost 6 and almost trained not to slam into Mommy full tilt on Sundays (possibly due to my involuntary knee/chest defensive moves and and cranial swats) I'd like to wear heels again.
But something happens to the body between 35 and 40. (Yes, 40.) Those cute, little cheapo shoes from PayLess and The Shoe Dept that were just fine for adolescent and Young Adult feet, just don't cut it anymore. Believe me, I've tried. I've even tried pricier shoes from more expensive department stores - you know, the ones that are made for "all day comfort" that look like granny is trying to be stylish. Nope. 20 minutes in and my feet start to get sore, 40 minutes of choir and the pain is creeping up my right leg. 3 or more hours and I'll be crippled by the next day.
I need more arch support and less crushing in the toes now. I need a heel that is more than 3 mm wide. I need some way to keep a shoe on my foot while dragging my little miscreant out of sacrament meeting by the ear. Cinderella moments are not cool when you're dragging a screamer up the aisle while Daddy is stuck on the stand and the whole congregation is tuned into your crisis.
Miss Congeniality moments are even worse. If you've been there, you know - everyone watches you tumble, the screamer gets away - laughing - Elders are mortified by the unexpected glimpse of the Branch President's wife's cleavage or knees or whatever else was exposed in the tumble . . .
Anyway, I'm sure that my extra Maxx weight makes the pain and instability worse but even after I lose a few pounds, tone up these abs and strengthen these ankles, those funky, accessible shoes are still going to hurt my feet and be impractical.
I have managed to find a pair of knee high pleather boots that are relatively comfortable when paired with an arch support insole. But spring is coming. And summer. I still have a cute, but bland, pair of flats. I have my Tevas for informal wear on hot hot days. I've got nothing really good for dancing or dressing up. But what I really want . . . and I shouldn't post this because Molly will see and I will never ever ever hear the end of it because she will want some, too. . . . is to try a pair of Fluevogs.
I know - totally out of my league at $200-$300 a pair. But they're so funky. And they are supposed to be supremely comfortable. Forget the ball gown and the pumpkin coach - if I had a fairy Godmother, I would wish for these shoes.
. . . .